My Calling
Though I get by, my hindi is appaling at best. I often find myself mired in complicated and embarassing situations, because I cant make myself understood, or because I simply cant understand what the guy talking to me is saying. And the more I get flustered the less I understand, and the more complicated the situation is going to get.
Im doing the sound for a play, and helping me out is the tech guy, a gentleman named Jasbir Bhaiya (JB). JB and I were ensconsed in the lights room earlier today, watching the rather disorganised play downstairs, and we got rather chatty despite my hindi.
However one sticky situation arose while I was crawling around under the lights console, trying to hook up my ipod.
JB: Aapne bilkul galat line chose kiya hai. (you have chosen the wrong line)
I stare up at him from my submissive position on my knees, confusion wrinkling my forehead. I begin to examine the bundle of wires in my hand more closely, carefully tracing them back to the slots in the sound board marked Line 1, Line 2 and so on. Since Im relatively new to the sound tech world, today being my first day, it was not inconceivable that i had messed up royally.
JB: Mera matlab hai, yeh jo line hai, bahut mushkil hai. Aapko bahut musibat ho gi. Hum sab ko bahut musibat hoti hai. (I mean, this line is very difficult. Youll have lots of trouble. We'll all have lots of trouble)
I begin to panic quite seriously. I have no idea what Ive done that is so disastrous, but clearly it could put the whole play in jeopardy. I go over every wire in the sound board, but they all appear to plugged into the right slot. Miserable and close to a major breakdown i turn to the heartless JB and ask,
"Kaunsi line?" (which line is it?)
JB: Theatre ki line! Iss me bahut musibat hoti hai! Raat ke dus baje tak rehearsal ke liye rehna parta hai! (The theatre line! Its a very difficult profession. Rehearsals go on till ten at night!)
I stare at JB, struggling with a mix of horror, delight, relief and an irrrepressible desire to giggle like an idiot.
He's right. Theatre is a tough profession. Where else could this have happened to me?
19 comments:
Mera bhi adhik kharab hai, I know the abuses with the vernacular twang.
heehehe i know a bunch of abuses too, but mostly i dont know what they mean!
you know, actually, you don't have to know what they mean. i feel very unindian when i see my hindi-skill failing in front of an autowallas...hehe!
i hate you
*wails*
ye kya ho rahaa hai? jai, you were the rajkumar of some jaageer (Ive forgotten what krishnan told me back at school), but really, hindi adhik kharab kaise? rajput ho re.
to mish: seekho abhi. rapidex course laao, aur seekho. hindi hamaari maatr bhaasha hai.
okay, enough. i've disgraced myself by actually knowing hindi. throw me down the hall of inane accented comments. :p
sigh. delhi is populated with people who make Hindi sound ugly either by knowing it too well or by knowing it like everyone here. It's difficult to gauge which one of you is the worst, but it's painful to hear all the same. You struggle with your one language just like the Americans... don't wear it like a compliment. And Misha, you mistranslated one of your sentences.
aaki: thanks, nice, but i was miserable at hindi -- all my life. now that somehow, after flunking my first-year and by god's grace (fluke) cleared my second-year. i swear i dont know hndi that well. yes, yes, yes...i'm not a jageer (for a second i thought you were calling me Jagger), i'm a prince of a defunct royality...
bholenath: dude, you're right. nothing to be too happy here. but hear the darn news on fm and tell me if thats the hindi you know...
To Jai: Jagger? awh. You know I absolutely adore thy writing (and would put you down with The Beat Generation sometimes), but I've never really ever heard you sing, rajkumar. --bows--
And if you had to be a Stone, I'd call you Keith. Somehow you and Richards make sense.
To Mish: Sorry for jamming space. But there was an eg-Jagger-ated need here. :)
nope not even rajkumar, the actor...
I call you KEITH RICHARDS and you focus on measly Rajkumar? --stamps feet--
Btw, even the actor was fun. There is this sheesha-dialogue-thing that stays on in my mind. And I don't even watch Hindi films.
the only scene i remember of his was when he got kidnapped by Veerapan! Keef, naa I dont fit in!
oh my goodness jai, not that southie Rajkumar. There used to a Hindi film Rajkumar. ahah.
And Keith's beautiful.
(swear mish, last comment :p jerry's getting it all wrong.)
Mr. Bholenath: My one language happens to be English. Stop living in the past, its as much an Indian language as hindi and assamese.
People like you, with your closed minds and ridiculous judgements, annoy me.
If you want to be a dinosaur, keep it off my blog.
Misha, dear, despite your best protests, English by its very name is not an Indian language, regardless of how many telecallers India produces. It has nothing to do with the past or present. Americans get by fine with their one language, and maybe if you lived there you would too. But your post shows how your inability to pick up a local languauge can cause inconveniences. But you probably need anger management before Hindi lessons.
ai hai is it back?
I am not by any stretch of imagnation, your dear anything.
Keep off my blog nincompoop.
Mincat: No clue, tho he seems to be just as proficient at making an ass of himself.
hey, not writing?
aaki i do hope u read this .i've been following your blog for long now n im sure there are a lot more people like me doin the same.i'd request you to put it back for just about anyone to read.
Anon: I'm sorry that its over, and I'm glad that you used to follow it.
Mish: erm.
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